Managing Conversations: Encouraging Speech, Clarifying Understanding and Dealing with Interruptions

This post follows on from the previous one about structuring a meeting. If you haven’t seen it yet, you can find the link here - Chairing Meetings: Introduction & Structuring the Agenda

In this post, we’ll look at another meeting scenario—this time a one-to-one conversation between the mediator (Aled) and one of the conflict parties (Francis), who is accompanied by their lawyer (Alex). There are three particularly useful skills highlighted in the video:

1.       Encouraging people to expand on what they’ve said

2.       Clarifying our understanding

3.       Handling interruptions without losing the flow of the meeting

Watch the video below, and pay attention to how Aled demonstrates understanding, paraphrases Francis’s comments, and manages interruptions from Alex. After that, I will break down some of the phrases and techniques used so you can see how to incorporate them into your own English communication skills.

Okay, now let’s break down the language used.

1) Encouraging People to Expand on What They’ve Said

Francis is clearly talking, but Aled uses a number of phrases to encourage the conversation further;

• “Tell me a little more about what they are...”

• “Say a bit more about what’s worrying you…”

This works well as it both encourages further conversation, but also allows the conversation to be gently guided according to what Aled feels necessary to focus on.

2. Clarifying Our Understanding

Aled paraphrases a lot in the conversation, restating and clarifying what has been said in a neutral way.

• “It sounds like...”

• “What I’m hearing you tell me is...

• “What I'm hearing you saying is…“

• “If I’ve understood you correctly,...”

These sentences work well by both showing an understanding of what is being said, and making sure that what has been said has been properly understood. The speaker is then shown that they are being listened to, and also gives them the chance to correct or refine what has been understood.

3) Handling Interruptions Without Losing the Flow of the Meeting

In the conversation, Alex interrupts several times, changing the direction of the conversation and ultimately getting in the way of Aled's intended focus of conversation. He uses two phrases to bring things back on track;

• “Look, I really appreciate that you want to represent Francis’s interests…”

• “But...It would really help me if I could improve my understanding of his key concerns.”

I find this approach quite clever in that it acknowledges the person interrupting's intentions and then reinforces the purpose of the conversation.

So when are these skills actually useful?

Any time you’re in a conversation where you need to keep a clear focus—whether in a meeting or a day-to-day work discussion—these techniques become valuable. If your goal is to gather information, ensure you’ve understood someone correctly, give them space to speak openly, and keep the discussion free from unnecessary interruptions, then the skills we’ve looked at here will help you do exactly that.