How to Deal With Angry People at Work: Practical Skills and English Phrases You Can Use

In this article, we look at one of the most difficult—and most important—communication skills in the workplace: dealing with people who are angry. Some of this involves understanding how to calm a tense situation, but for English learners the key goal is learning what to say and how to say it. From my experience, there are four essential skills that help you manage anger professionally and confidently:

1.       Acknowledge the person’s anger

2.       Show that you are listening

3.       Re-frame toward a solution

4.       Clarify the issue

These four steps help you stay calm, reduce tension, and guide the conversation toward something productive.

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Seeing this in action

The following video is quite old, and I’ll replace it with something newer as soon as I find it, but it still gives a really good insight into dealing wit anger. Watch it, and see how the shop assistant deals with the angry customer.

In the video, the employee uses all four of these skills effectively. Let’s look at each step, how it works, how the employee demonstrated it, and the useful English phrases you can use yourself.

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1. Acknowledge the Person’s Anger

Before any solution is possible, an angry person needs to feel seen and heard. If you ignore their feelings or jump straight to solutions, the anger usually gets worse.

How it appears in the video

The employee responds calmly right away - “Sir, I can tell that you’re really frustrated…”. This immediately reduces tension because it shows understanding rather than defensiveness.

Useful English phrases for acknowledging feelings

You can use simple, polite phrases like:

• “I can see that you’re upset /  frustrated...”

• “I understand this is upsetting / frustrating...”

• “I can see this situation has been really upsetting / frustrating for you.”

• “I can hear how upset / frustrated you are....”

  
  

These phrases show empathy without taking blame or escalating the situation.

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2. Show That You Are Listening

Once the emotion is acknowledged, the next step is to prove you are really listening. Many conflicts continue simply because the person feels unheard.

How it appears in the video

The employee allows the customer to explain fully, and then says: “I just want to make sure I understand…”. He then repeats the customer’s story step-by-step.

Useful English phrases for active listening

These are excellent for English learners:

• “I want to understand what has happened...”

• “Let me make sure I understand you properly...”

• “I’m glad you are explaining this to me...”

Showing that you’re actively listening helps reduce anger more than almost anything else.

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3. Re-Frame Toward a Solution

After emotions are acknowledged and the story is clear, it’s important to guide the conversation forward. Angry people often focus on blame; your role is to turn the conversation toward resolving the issue.

How it appears in the video

The employee says: “I’d like to work together to turn things around.” and “Is there something I can do that would make this right?”

He focuses on the future instead of the problem itself.

Useful English phrases for solution-focused language

Try using:

• “Let’s see what we can do to fix this.”

• “How can we move forward from here?”

• “Let’s look at possible solutions together.”

  
  

These phrases gently pull the conversation into a calmer, more productive space.

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4. Clarify the Issue

Sometimes angry people express their feelings before they express the facts. Clarifying the issue helps you avoid misunderstandings and find the right solution.

How it appears in the video

The employee restates the situation clearly: “You purchased a drill… it didn’t work… you returned it… the replacement also didn’t work.” By clarifying, he ensures he’s solving the real problem.

Useful English phrases for clarifying

Here are helpful ways to do this:

• “Just to confirm, the problem is…”

• “Let me check that I understand correctly…”

• “Are you saying that…?”

• “Can I ask a quick question to clarify?”

• “Do you mean that…?”

• “When you say ____, do you mean…?”

• “Help me understand this part—what happened after…?”

Clarity reduces frustration and prevents future conflict.

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Bringing It All Together

 Learning useful phrases is an important first step, but real communication requires more than memorizing lines. De-escalating anger, showing empathy, and guiding a difficult conversation all depend on using these phrases comfortably, confidently, and in the right order.

The good news is that these situations can be safely and effectively practiced in English lessons. Real-life simulations, role plays, and controlled dialogues allow you to experiment with tone, body language, and timing. You learn how to acknowledge feelings, show you're listening, clarify the issue, and move toward solutions — as one smooth interaction, not four separate steps.

With regular practice, these phrases stop feeling like “lines” and start becoming part of your natural communication style. And when a real angry customer, colleague, or client appears, you’ll be ready to respond calmly, professionally, and confidently.